[identity profile] madam-zarenyia.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] small_things
*scrambles up a sheer face of desert scree and spots everyone preparing to depart*

Aha! Hello? Hellooo?

*above the waist, is a cheery redhead dressed in a fetching goth / steampunk sort of outfit, complete with frilly black parasol*

*below the waist, is a GINORMOUS FECKOFF BLACK WIDOW SPIDER*

*waves to attract attention, with free arm and both forward pincers*

...Um...excuse me? Hello! ...Yoo-hoo?

Date: 2016-10-13 06:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] temeraire1805.livejournal.com
*lands in front of you with a ground-shaking THUMP!*

*ROARS defensively with ruff raised*

Date: 2016-10-13 10:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] temeraire1805.livejournal.com
*is very taken aback*

I beg your pardon?

No, no, I am not an Imperial. I am, in fact, a Celestial. Lung Tien Xiang. But my Western name is Temeraire.

I'm terribly sorry, but... *peers at your spider leggies* are you quite all right?

Date: 2016-10-14 01:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] missmollyhooper.livejournal.com
*walks up from a small path hand in hand with Martin*

We've seen Tarry and Alice safely off. They'll be heading off to...I dunno, make maps or something. Couldn't get them to speak plain English. They've taken Dean and Sam as well. Poor things weren't too keen on more flying. Prefer to drive that fancy sports car.

*sees huge feckoff spider woman shift forms*

*puts hand on flower spike just in case*

Hello.

Date: 2016-10-14 02:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] missmollyhooper.livejournal.com
They went poof.
Edited Date: 2016-10-14 02:29 am (UTC)

Date: 2016-10-18 02:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] merida-dunbroch.livejournal.com
Well, I dunno. Ye were just half a big feckoff spider a minute ago.

*draws bow*

I'm no' sure I'm verra comfortable wi' that.

Date: 2016-10-18 02:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] i-k-blue.livejournal.com
Good afternoon! Call me Hugh. I am reliably informed you provide Pleasures. Could I trouble you for a freshly-stretched canvas?

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From: [identity profile] i-k-blue.livejournal.com - Date: 2016-10-18 02:54 am (UTC) - Expand

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Date: 2016-10-14 03:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sybil-t-psychic.livejournal.com
*draws you sharply aside*

*stage whisper*

Miss Hooper...have you any idea what that...thing...is? It's a...*voice drops even lower, as though speaking a disgusting dirty word*...a succubus. A devil from hell! It punishes the wicked by catching them and...well, and...er...you know...*vague hand motions; finally, when you don't get it*...pleasures them to death, and then devours their immortal souls!

That thing is without doubt the deadliest creature we have yet encountered in this realm. Are you prepared to have it just lollygagging about in our midst?

Date: 2016-10-14 06:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] missmollyhooper.livejournal.com
*seriously considers*

I'm hardly qualified to judge. With the things we've seen and done in such a short time...

*considers harder*

But we do have a few people who aren't completely innocent. I wouldn't call them "wicked", but some of us do have blood on our hands...

*visibly considers*

Then again, we could always impose a watch on her. Perhaps have the dragons guard her...

*looks up at Temeraire, then at Sherlock, eyes widening*

*whispers almost inaudibly*

D'you think she'd try to sleep with one of them?

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From: [identity profile] sybil-t-psychic.livejournal.com - Date: 2016-10-14 06:57 pm (UTC) - Expand

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Date: 2016-10-18 02:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] capt-crieff.livejournal.com
*cannot believe own luck, getting hand held by a pretty girl and whatnot*

Date: 2016-10-13 11:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] i-k-blue.livejournal.com
*tries to hide behind Bilbo's neck, almost strangling him in the process*

Date: 2016-10-14 01:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bilbo-baggins.livejournal.com
*thrown off-balance, trying to keep from strangling*

My dear fellow! What on earth is the matt -

*gets one look at Zarenyia and DIVES behind the nearest boulder*

*grabs Sting by the hilt and peeks out from behind the rock*

Spiders...why does it always have to be spiders...?

Date: 2016-10-16 10:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] i-k-blue.livejournal.com
What are those shapes talking about? I can't hear them.

Date: 2016-10-17 09:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bilbo-baggins.livejournal.com
The big spider-lady wants to ride the dragons with us to Mount Axis. Also, the spider-lady is a devil from hell.

0_o

Also, the spider-lady can made her back end disappear.

Sybil thinks we should tell her no. Molly's worried what she'll do if we tell her no.

...And now the spider-lady is making kissing noises at Sherlock.

Date: 2016-10-18 01:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bilbo-baggins.livejournal.com
Well, it's, um...it's quite simple really, it's...er...well, it's a place where some folk believe that bad people go when they die. There are devils that live there to punish the bad folk. I suppose our spider-lady must be one of them.

I thought I heard Sybil say something about her pleasuring people to death, too. Can't think what she meant. In my case I rather suspect it would involve an infinite tub full of soap and warm water and copious amounts of bacon and eggs.

Date: 2016-10-18 02:04 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] i-k-blue.livejournal.com
Bad people? Shapes can be bad? There aren't any bad colours. There are colours that clash, but that's not the same thing.

Why the dayglo purple fuck does every comment I make appear twice?!

Date: 2016-10-18 02:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bilbo-baggins.livejournal.com
Well, yes. I'm afraid so. Usually wherever gold is concerned, I've found. Gold turns many folks' heads as wouldn't hurt a fly otherwise.

So nice it posted twice?

Date: 2016-10-18 02:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] i-k-blue.livejournal.com
Bilbo Baggins! I have an Idea (http://small-things.livejournal.com/13667.html?thread=538723#t538723).

Date: 2016-10-18 02:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bilbo-baggins.livejournal.com
No, wait!

*scrambles up and tries to follow you as you flutter away towards the big dangerous spider-lady*

*hangs back as cautiously as possible, with a hand on Sting in case you need rescuing*

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